Make My Demons Run: DVD Commentary

Okay, as you all know, Make My Demons Run was my submission for this year's smoochfest! I LOVED writing this, guys, just so, so much. I love music, especially songs that tell an epic story, and I was so excited when I saw the prompt given for a story to be written based on two of Metallica's most epic songs: Unforgiven I, and Unforgiven II. James Hetfield wrote the first song about himself, about how he still feels complicit in the religious reasonings of his parents that led his mother to her death, in the ensuing alcoholism and anger issues that he dealt with and pushed his relationship with his wife to the edge. Perfect for Draco, right? The second song is about moving on from those mistakes, about accepting that while what he has done in the past may be unforgivable, that doesn't mean that there is no future for him. It's about learning that other people also have things in their past that they feel are unforgivable too. It's about realising that unforgivable doesn't mean unlovable, that it doesn't mean the end of everything. What a great tie-in to Harry and Draco, don't you think?

I don't usually plan my stories out much when I write them. I tend to start off with a vague scene in my head that encapsulates the prompt I'm working from, and then I work out how to get there while I'm writing. Sometimes I write out a vague bullet-pointed plotline, but what I end up with rarely even vaguely resmbles what I started with (also the word count somehow ends up way higher than I predicted). But this fic was different, because it spoke to me on such a personal level. I too have things in my past that I can't forget, things that I can't forgive myself for. There are times when I too think that I'm not deserving of the love my family and friends give to me, times when I sometimes stop and wonder how I could have just moved on from those things because how could I think that I have the right? I think we all have moments like that in our past, albeit maybe not to the extent of either Draco's or what Hetfield thinks about himself.

So this fic became very important to me, not just on a personal level, but also in regards to how I feel about the character of Draco Malfoy, and the ways in which I think Harry may have reacted in the aftermath of the war. These two songs became questions about these boys in my head: How would Draco feel about the things he knew to be right but never acted upon? Would Harry think about some of the things he'd had to do and hate himself for them? And while I thought about these questions, thoughts of how I could express that through the reimagining of these two songs began to form.

So, I've written this “DVD Commentary”, for anyone interested in seeing my thought processes as I wrote this story.

( DVD Commentary )