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lauren3210I’ve been thinking about writing a post about this for quite a while, mainly because every time I sign myself up to a gift fic fest such as ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
hd_erised, I am never entirely sure what I want to say when it comes to my preferences. I mean, if anyone were to ask me which I prefer, I would say Top!Harry/bottom!Draco, however, some of my favourite H/D fics ever feature explicit Top!Draco/bottom!Harry, and I’ve been trying to figure out why that is for the longest time. And so, as I’m currently in the home stretch of my Erised fic and have a lot of other projects that could do with some time being spent on them, I am of course procrastinating terribly by thinking about this instead so, here I am!
As a multi-fandom shipper with a lot of ships under my belt, I tend to skip from one to the other during my fic reading time, and I’ve started to notice a bit of a pattern: I prefer the mouthy guy in the relationship to be the bottom. It’s not always the case, but in general that seems to be my preference. For example, I like my Sterek fics to feature a sarcastic, smart-mouthed Stiles, and a grumbly and frustrated Derek only managing to get him to shut the fuck up while he’s fucking him into incoherency. I like a Merlin running rings around his confused and irritated Arthur until Arthur pins him against a wall and sticks his tongue down his throat. I like a Steve McGarrett who is completely hypnotized by the movements of Danno’s hands during his many angry rants, until he pins those flailing hands behind Danno’s back. I like a Bucky who finds Steve’s sassy comebacks hilarious until they're directed at him, and then he needs to find another use for that mouth. I like a prim and put together Arthur who can only be reduced to a sweaty, blushing mess when Eames is whispering dirty things into his ear.
So it seems that, in general, I like the big, muscled, sometimes not entirely human, guy being pulled around by the chest hair by their sarcastic, mouthy, sometimes slighter counterpart. Or, in other words, I like the more physically capable guy fucking the more mentally capable guy, because that’s the only time in the relationship when they can get the upper hand. Maybe it’s because I recognize something in them about myself and my own relationship, I don’t know, but it does seem to be my thing. Everyone’s got their preferences though, I guess.
But there are some ships that just don’t fit that mold, and H/D is the most obvious one. I mean, you could possibly break them down into their simplest forms for them to fit – if all Harry was was a Quidditch player, then he could be the muscled guy, and Draco could be the mouthy sarcastic guy – but trying to do that feels very wrong to me, because that’s not how I see them at all.
As much as I believe that a person’s sexual preferences have nothing to do with how they act in real life – unassuming in the boardroom does not automatically translate into a submissive in the bedroom, nor does it mean the opposite – I do think that in fiction, sexual dynamics can be a useful tool for highlighting a character, or a relationship. And I think that this is what trips me up when it comes to H/D; because there are so many fanon interpretations of their relationship that my preferences fluctuate too much for me to generalize them. Unlike the vast majority of my other ships, who are at the very least friendly with each other (if not best friends) canonically, in the books the most civilized Harry and Draco get with each other is when they actively ignore each other, so there's really not much there for me to get a baseline for their romantic interactions.
So I think that, when my initial response is to say I prefer Top!Harry/bottom!Draco, I am actually trying to fit them into a generalization that I have made for myself through reading about other ships. Harry, with his ‘jump first, think later’ attitude, is more likely to fit the ‘physically capable’ role, and Draco, with his calculating schemes, is more likely to fit the ‘mentally capable’ role, and so my brain automatically slots them into those places. The only problem is that they can, and do, fit both of those roles depending on the story being told (maybe Harry’s an Auror, or maybe Draco is, or Harry’s a little bit lost post-war, and Draco’s a damn dragon-tamer), and so the sexual dynamic tool is used in a multitude of ways, because that is the beauty of story-telling.
So, at the end of my rambling musings, I guess my answer to the question of what my preferences are should be this:
I truly don’t care, as long as the sex fits the relationship, and the relationship fits the story.
Okay, I’m gonna go write now, because I’ve procrastinated long enough (damn it). Back to your regularly scheduled Friday night on LJ!
hd_erised, I am never entirely sure what I want to say when it comes to my preferences. I mean, if anyone were to ask me which I prefer, I would say Top!Harry/bottom!Draco, however, some of my favourite H/D fics ever feature explicit Top!Draco/bottom!Harry, and I’ve been trying to figure out why that is for the longest time. And so, as I’m currently in the home stretch of my Erised fic and have a lot of other projects that could do with some time being spent on them, I am of course procrastinating terribly by thinking about this instead so, here I am!As a multi-fandom shipper with a lot of ships under my belt, I tend to skip from one to the other during my fic reading time, and I’ve started to notice a bit of a pattern: I prefer the mouthy guy in the relationship to be the bottom. It’s not always the case, but in general that seems to be my preference. For example, I like my Sterek fics to feature a sarcastic, smart-mouthed Stiles, and a grumbly and frustrated Derek only managing to get him to shut the fuck up while he’s fucking him into incoherency. I like a Merlin running rings around his confused and irritated Arthur until Arthur pins him against a wall and sticks his tongue down his throat. I like a Steve McGarrett who is completely hypnotized by the movements of Danno’s hands during his many angry rants, until he pins those flailing hands behind Danno’s back. I like a Bucky who finds Steve’s sassy comebacks hilarious until they're directed at him, and then he needs to find another use for that mouth. I like a prim and put together Arthur who can only be reduced to a sweaty, blushing mess when Eames is whispering dirty things into his ear.
So it seems that, in general, I like the big, muscled, sometimes not entirely human, guy being pulled around by the chest hair by their sarcastic, mouthy, sometimes slighter counterpart. Or, in other words, I like the more physically capable guy fucking the more mentally capable guy, because that’s the only time in the relationship when they can get the upper hand. Maybe it’s because I recognize something in them about myself and my own relationship, I don’t know, but it does seem to be my thing. Everyone’s got their preferences though, I guess.
But there are some ships that just don’t fit that mold, and H/D is the most obvious one. I mean, you could possibly break them down into their simplest forms for them to fit – if all Harry was was a Quidditch player, then he could be the muscled guy, and Draco could be the mouthy sarcastic guy – but trying to do that feels very wrong to me, because that’s not how I see them at all.
As much as I believe that a person’s sexual preferences have nothing to do with how they act in real life – unassuming in the boardroom does not automatically translate into a submissive in the bedroom, nor does it mean the opposite – I do think that in fiction, sexual dynamics can be a useful tool for highlighting a character, or a relationship. And I think that this is what trips me up when it comes to H/D; because there are so many fanon interpretations of their relationship that my preferences fluctuate too much for me to generalize them. Unlike the vast majority of my other ships, who are at the very least friendly with each other (if not best friends) canonically, in the books the most civilized Harry and Draco get with each other is when they actively ignore each other, so there's really not much there for me to get a baseline for their romantic interactions.
So I think that, when my initial response is to say I prefer Top!Harry/bottom!Draco, I am actually trying to fit them into a generalization that I have made for myself through reading about other ships. Harry, with his ‘jump first, think later’ attitude, is more likely to fit the ‘physically capable’ role, and Draco, with his calculating schemes, is more likely to fit the ‘mentally capable’ role, and so my brain automatically slots them into those places. The only problem is that they can, and do, fit both of those roles depending on the story being told (maybe Harry’s an Auror, or maybe Draco is, or Harry’s a little bit lost post-war, and Draco’s a damn dragon-tamer), and so the sexual dynamic tool is used in a multitude of ways, because that is the beauty of story-telling.
So, at the end of my rambling musings, I guess my answer to the question of what my preferences are should be this:
I truly don’t care, as long as the sex fits the relationship, and the relationship fits the story.
Okay, I’m gonna go write now, because I’ve procrastinated long enough (damn it). Back to your regularly scheduled Friday night on LJ!
(no subject)
Date: 2016-10-29 08:24 am (UTC)When I joined fandom I thought this topping and bottoming preference thing was weird and childish. I was so above that.
HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA.
I am such a dick.
It took me a while to realise that I had a preference for Top!Draco, and longer still not to feel ashamed about that. I think I'm getting worse, though. I used to just prefer it, then STRONGLY prefer it, but this year I read the most perfect fic which was everything I adore and the dynamic between them was so perfect and it was also so well-written... and then HARRY TOPPED. OMG, I was honestly really AFFECTED by it. It genuinely upset me and I had to stop reading for a while. I had been so immersed in the story and then that happened and... ugh, I was a mess.
I tried to pick it apart afterwards, and I think it wasn't so much the actual fact of penetration (I seriously HOPE not, because I don't want to become one of those people who leaves prompts saying "ON NO ACCOUNT MUST A PENIS TOUCH DRACO'S BODY"). I think it was the (to me) sudden and OOC personality switch that came with the sex. I like the sex to reflect their characterisation and the dynamic between them, and I'm not talking about one being 'the girl' or 'the weak one'. I mean something like a need for control, or a need to give up control. A need to submit / dominate, or to be the aggressor maybe? If that gets flipped around without warning and without justification then I'm left feeling unhappy.
Conversely, I can read stories where Draco likes to bottom, where Draco is the sub, where they switch, whatever, as long as the characterisation fits and I can make it mesh with my view of the pairing. I've also WRITTEN bottom Draco, lots of times, and it's usually my head canon for them when they first start fucking if they're still young. I like to write inexperienced!Harry, and experienced!Draco, and I often imagine Draco would let Harry fuck him first, partly because it will just be easier, more pleasurable, and less likely to freak Harry out, haha. But in my mind he's totally doing it as a stratagem to get Harry hooked, not because he secretly desires the hero to take him up the arse.
I'm making no sense. I am a mess of contradictions. Basically, what I beg is, don't give me a delicious Toppy!Draco and then have him turn feminine or weak in the bedroom. Not that I think bottoming is feminine or weak. OH GOD I CAN'T EXPLAIN LOLOL.
I really should go and write my erised as well :D
(no subject)
Date: 2016-10-29 10:04 am (UTC)I've always had an interest in fic preferences, and I think it's because things like stereotypes affect myself and the people I love IRL. My brother is gay. He's a computer nerd, wears hipster glasses and grandad cardigans and barely reaches six feet tall. His fiance is 6ft 4, and is an MMA fighter, and he gets really annoyed when straight people assume that he's the Top in their relationship, just because Joseph is slighter and therefore less 'manly' than he is. And so it's always at the back of my mind when reading fic: Do I like this just because it fits my subconscious heteronormativity? So I'm always kind of consciously checking myself to make sure that it's an aesthetic I like because I like it, and not because society has programmed me to look for. (I also do it for skin colour: Do I like reading about boys with pale skin getting marked up because I like it, or because people have always pointed out my own dark skin tone in negative ways?)
I get what you mean about that fic you read though, and I think you mean it how I mean it - the dynamic in the bedroom should fit the characterisations in the rest of the fic. And I think that preferences like these really come down to the types of stories we like to read; I know you like an unredeemed!Draco, and I think that Top!Draco really helps showcase that characterisation, so it makes sense to have him written that way, it flows better.
Okay, definitely time to get back to writing my erised *grr* ♥
(no subject)
Date: 2016-10-29 10:21 am (UTC)the dynamic in the bedroom should fit the characterisations in the rest of the fic. And I think that preferences like these really come down to the types of stories we like to read; I know you like an unredeemed!Draco, and I think that Top!Draco really helps showcase that characterisation
Agreed, 100%. That doesn't mean I can't enjoy sub!Draco stories, or top!Harry, but the writer has more work to convince me that I like it, because it doesn't always fit with my expectations or preferences for characterisation.
Thank you for the interesting discussion. Now totally back to erised. (The mods are watching!!)
(no subject)
Date: 2016-10-29 02:23 pm (UTC)That doesn't mean I can't enjoy sub!Draco stories, or top!Harry, but the writer has more work to convince me that I like it, because it doesn't always fit with my expectations or preferences for characterisation. -- Yes, exactly! And that means that we automatically search for the ones we know are easily going to hit our hot spots.
(I am totally writing erised as we speak, honest! *coughs then runs and hides*)
(no subject)
Date: 2016-10-29 02:51 pm (UTC)I do love Glitterland - do you have the audiobook? I can highly recommend! The narrator does both Ash and Darrian beautifully IMO. I actually had problems with Glitterland until I heard the audiobook and really was able to empathise with Ash's emotional pain. Before then I had problems with his selfishness and his frustrating behaviour. The audiobook got me on his side again!
(no subject)
Date: 2016-10-29 02:54 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2016-10-29 03:21 pm (UTC)I don't have the audiobook - I have an auditory processing disorder that pretty much renders those impossible for me - but I had no problems relating to Ash. I thought AH really approached his bi-polar incredibly well, which was important for me - one of the reasons I have so many tattoos is because I suffer from hypergraphia just like Ash, so it was so cool to have someone so much like me as an MC!
(no subject)
Date: 2016-10-30 02:31 pm (UTC)Yes, the cooking bit. *eye roll* I imagine some people's parents are genuinely that dense about it, he's possibly writing from people's experiences! But it was no fun. I can see why you stopped. I liked the ~concept of someone being in love with their bully, it has its appeal, in a nasty, dub con, transgressive and twisted way, but it left a nasty taste in my mouth in this story which was basically a romance.
And I think Ash was written very well, and the problem was mine. I used to suffer from clinical depression for a lot of my life and I have problems relating to depressed characters because I can't let myself empathise with them. I close off and become all dismissive and defensive instead, and feel angry with them. Ash got to me quite a lot, I hated his behaviour and couldn't empathise, but hearing Nick Boulton portray him made me soften. I love that he was relatable for you, must have been a good experience to find that complexity in a MC.
(no subject)
Date: 2016-10-29 04:34 pm (UTC)